Monday, May 12, 2008

Oh, and another thing I'm hopeless at

I want to make my boys aprons. You know, something smock-y/apron-y that they can wear while cooking and doing crafts. Kind of like something you'd expect to see at Pottery Barn Kids, except I don't want to have to pay $50 for two of them.

I went to the fabric store, and they each picked some fabric from the upholstery remnants section of the store.

Then I went to the pattern section, because I figure I should get a pattern. Do I know how to follow a pattern? Nope! But I figure how hard can it be? I'll never know, because I couldn't figure out how to even find a pattern. There were piles of books with all kinds of pictures in them, but no discernible indices**. I did manage to find some children's aprons, just by paging through some books, but they were really frilly and girlie. Clearly I don't have much of a problem with that. It wasn't so much an issue of gender roles as "good golly, there's no way I can sew all that frilly crap! I can barely use my sewing machine!" Then I realized that I don't even know how to go from the book to the file cabinets full of patterns. The boys running around like crazy people wasn't helping my concentration much, either.

So now I realize I:

1) Don't know how to read a pattern

2) Don't know how to find the pattern I'd like to make in the books of patterns.

3) Don't know how to find the actual pattern once I've located it in the book.

That's a lot of "I don't knows". So what do I decide to do? Just buy the fabric and wing it. I winged it the past two Halloweens, turning my boys into playing card Jokers (that turned out pretty well), and newts (not quite as well as most people thought they were dragons or ninja turtles). My theory of sewing is to keep cutting and sewing until it vaguely resembles whatever I'm trying to make. Then I'm done.

Wish me luck. Or better yet, wish my boys luck. Maybe they'll get their aprons before they turn 10. Or maybe it'll never turn into aprons but will instead become some oddly shaped cape or something. We'll see!

**English is so weird. I was pretty sure the plural of index was indices. However, I'm getting a red underline under the word's not being recognized as a word! I looked it up, and apparently "indexes" is the more accepted pluralization of index. I guess I'm hopeless at correct English grammar as well. Oh wait, all my regular readers must know that anyway!


Family Nutritionist said...

If you aren't using a pattern, just hold the fabric up to the boys and mark it.

As for patterns, look for something they might also wear in a woodworking shop. Or BBQ. Or Art class. Something like this or this, or even this. OMG aren't they cute? I don't use patterns, either. I construct things.

Family Nutritionist said...

Thanks for you comments on my blog. I followed you home from FoodontheFood. It was just a little bit of drive-by encouragement.

Forget about pockets (they'd just collect ingredients) to skip the pattern. Only make straight lines to skip binding and facing. Sew the ties on with a straight-stitched rectangle and an X.

You'll be done in less than an hour. Do it NOW! Do it NOW! I want to see!

If you really wanted to learn all that other stuff, you'd read a book or take a class. You haven't, which means you don't. It's not hopelessness -- it's a choice.

And of course your kids are not starving to death. If they're hungry, they'll eat what you serve them. Except, of course, when they want it in the middle of the afternoon while you're trying clothes on them and you swore to yourself you would not reward them with junkfood for skipping their lunch.

Threeundertwo said...

Here's an example of a pattern . You could just adjust the size down a little bit.

Love your blog. Good to know I can skip that Jody Piccoult book. My "to read" stack is already too high.