Tuesday, February 17, 2009

The most (sarcastic) awesome Valentine's Day on record

So, did you all have a nice Valentine's Day? I hope so!

We didn't. Are you ready for a gross story? Here's how mine went:

Well, first I should qualify that I'm not a big fan of the "holiday". We don't really celebrate it. Call us unromantic, but it I'd much rather be kind to one another every day than create some unrealistic demands on a Hallmark holiday.

However, I'd hoped it would go better than this.

We started out our day by...wait for it...renting a storage space. And moving a zillion boxes and furniture! Really, nothing says "Valentine's Day" like a little manual labor.

We got home around lunch time, when B-man started to feel sick. He'd had a stomach bug Thursday night, but hadn't thrown up since then. Turns out he was saving it up for Saturday.

Around dinner time, B-man threw up all over EVERYTHING. I was sitting on the couch with him, and he managed to hit every couch cushion. And a blanket. And me. And N-man. N-man reacted as I wanted to: he ran into the corner, yelling and crying "It's on me! It's on me! Get it OFFFFFFF!" But then running away whenever we tried to get his clothes off.

TK and I started mopping up as best we could the couch and floor, and stripped both boys. TK started a bath and threw the boys in the tub, while I grabbed the blanket, the kids' clothes, and headed down to the laundry. I stripped myself as I was completely covered. I mean, my hair, my shirt, both arms, my watch, my pants, even my socks. It was truly disgusting. I cranked the washer up to hot, and got it going. Then I raced upstairs, completely naked (and still with PUKE in my hair! ACK!)

Now I have a problem, though. What I want more than anything is to turn the shower as hot as it can possibly go, and wash 10,000 times while scalding my skin for about an hour until I finally feel clean. But of course, after the boys' bath, and the hot water washer load, there is almost no hot water left. So I'm forced to shiver in the lukewarm water, desperately washing and washing and washing, hoping frigid water is as good at removing germs as hot.

I went downstairs, and TK and I just stared at the couch. It was pretty disgusting. I finally decided to scrub it with a scrub brush and dishwashing detergent. Probably not the recommended treatment, but it worked.

We got the boys to bed. And that's when TK started to feel sick...

So, I fully realize our Valentine's Day could have been far, far worse. But still, I think that any Valentine's Day that starts out with manual labor and finishes up with half the house covered in vomit deserves a do-over. I hope all of you had a better weekend than we did. And I'm hoping next year we can have a slightly more romantic Valentine's Day!

11 comments:

Nancy said...

oh no!! That sounds like our house...only, not on Valentines Day. Sheesh I sure hope everyone is feeling better today.

Snickollet said...

I am so sorry! I hope you're all feeling better. And cleaner.

jongirl said...

Talk about Puke House! Nothing like a bit of vomit to say I love you .... hope B is better and none of the rest of you have caught the spewing sickness.

jules said...

i love your thoughts on valentine's day. BFF and i saw the bacon brothers on sunday and kevin (who is such a cutie) commented on the fact that some people celebrated valentine's day the day before; they celebrate it all year long. i love that.

in other news...misery loves company, so i wanted to tell you, you're not alone with regard to the pukefest. i was all set to walk out the door yesterday when h-man began spewing from one end of the dining/LR to the other (including the back of the couch). i didn't feel so great myself last night, but i think everyone is on the mend. hope that's the case in your household too.

LauraC said...

Totally sucks about the puke. Really sucks. Dealing with puking toddlers is so much worse than puking babies.

Jon and I also do not celebrate valentine's day. We do not celebrate New Year's Eve either and people always think we're weird. Why celebrate love and new beginnings on a certain day? Now Mother's Day, I totally get...

Amy said...

oh yuck! so sorry. hope you're all feeling better:)

HoodChick said...

This is on my top 10 list of reasons to not have kids. The puking. Really, I can't take it. I'm a sympathy barfer.

maggie said...

ewwww! so sorry. we've all been there and it's just hell. hope it's better today!

Jeanne said...

Laughing so hard prune juice is squirting out my nose....

Willo said...

Uggh! I am sorry you had a rough day! Thanks for stopping by my blog today!

lizcooper said...

wow...don't think I've ever heard of one going quite the way yours did. Hope you all are feeling better. Vomit is pretty normal at our house as one of our daughters throws up just about every time she gets upset about something...and guess what she's almost always had? Milk. There's nothing like curdled thrown up milk...really, there isn't.